It was a perfectly normal day… No different from any other regular day… But as I returned back home and turned the key to open the door of my empty house something strange happened… Tears just started rolling down… Unknowingly n uncontrollably…
Don’t know if it was missing those smiling faces or still having some of those faces and missing the smile…
Don’t know if it was missing that cluttered hostel room or loneliness of independence..
Don’t know if was an argument with a friend or missing the fun of a mindless argument with that friend..
Don’t know if it’s price of the gadget I cant afford now or losing the value of things I have..
Don’t know if it was the agony of losing loved ones in the past or the fear of not remembering them as often anymore..
Don’t know if it was losing touch with old friends or being in touch and still losing it…
Don’t know if it was the anxiety for the future or the pace at which the present is slipping..
Don’t know if it was the pain of not being able to keep up to my own expectations or at times doubting own capabilities..
Don’t know if it was missing good old days or not having time enough even to remember those days…
Don’t know if it’s the general sad mood around or the shear inability to appreciate joy in simple things….
Don’t know if it was that beggar by the road side or my helplessness at his plight..
Don’t know if it’s the sarcastic jokes I crack or the bitter truth hidden in those jokes..
Don’t know if it’s the fake-ness or a tiny wish that the fake was real...
Don’t know if it’s the empty house or irritation due to the crowd…
Don’t know if it’s the traffic or the pain of being just someone in the traffic…
Don’t know what made the tears flow,… I just don’t know….
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Friday, September 25, 2009
25 random things about me
1. I love writing, I don’t remember when I got a hang of it but now I truly enjoy Blogging.
2. I’m one hell of a procrastinator. I cant get to speed unless the 11th hour has passed.
3. I spent my first dollar in the US on a Starbucks Coffee, I still have that mug.
4. I hate being taken for granted. I’m like a child who constantly seeks attention.
5. On my first visit to college after graduating, one junior actually walked up to me and took my “Autograph” :D :D
6. I love gadgets. Technology n gadgets are big turn ons for me.
7. I have a theory proposed called “3 phases of friendship” it hasn’t failed till date and everyone who has heard bout it agrees to it.
8. I have dropped my cell in a shit hole once. No more details will be revealed.
9. My present cell phone takes 3 minutes to open one text message… Duh
10. As a child I wanted to be a Post-man, then a Police officer, later a Doc and finally settled to be an Engineer… And still don’t like it.
11. I once got the “Worst singer award”
12. I cannot distinguish any colors apart from basic ones. Tan, Purple, Lavender, Mauve etc totally perplex me.
13. As a child I had an imaginary friend and I myself was a different character in that world.
14. I’m afraid that I’m a minor Kleptomaniac. No raised eyebrows, I just have the urge to take things, I don’t actually steal them.
15. When I’m travelling alone, I play a totally different character from what I am and chat with ppl. (Once I played an NRI who has come back to India to find her ‘roots’ :P)
15. I'm proud the fact that I’m a Gemini.
17. I Google anything and everything. I have the most unimaginable searches under my belt. The top search being my own name...
18. I am also a minor case of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) I need the furniture in the exact place, books in a particular order, all frames aligned, etc etc…
19. I’m NOT really a happy-go-luck or don’t-care person, but I like to entertain that fraudulent idea in people.
20. I love planning Bday n surprise parties for my friends. The happiness is infectious and glint in the eyes is incomparable.
21. The most horrible movie I have watched in a theater is Jhoom Barabar Jhoom.
22. My favorite pass time at public places is to check out the brands various ppl are sporting, observing their body language and gestures.
23. I want to get a tattoo done but still wondering what and where.
24. As the name of the blog goes I’m stentorian (very loud) and so are my friends; we have been thrown out of every possible place due to the noise levels.. Lectures, Labs, Coffee shops, Hotels, Bus stops, Parking, Roads… Every damn place….
25. I ride a second hand (third hand really) Kinetic. I totally love that bike :D
Monday, September 14, 2009
Nostalgia… Theater days!!!
Aaaawaj konacha….. Arararara ghumtaye kon……
These slogans still never fail to make my hair stand at the end….
Even two years after being away from the action….
As I’m sitting in my hotel room on a sleepy Sunday afternoon, an e-mail pops up declaring my college makes it to the final round of Purushottam… And miles apart, in the US, I’m so excited that I can’t sit at one place…. I just wanna go back and congrulate the team, hug them, shout slogans with them….. Alas, all I can do is write a post…..
[For those who are unknown to the this world of Theater in Pune some information…
Firodiya Karandak and Purushottam Karandak are inter college Drama competitions. But it doesn’t stop there, for passionate ppl, its their life.. its an addiction.. Firodiya and Purushottam are synonyms for zeal, enthusiasm, passion and moreover a complete learning experience…]
It all began in Junior College when I used to read stories about theater, the impact it makes and how it totally changes rather enhances ones personality. I couldn’t wait to start college and become a part of a drama group. Thanks (duh…) to the slow admission procedure, by the time I got in the college, the auditions were done… And there went my one yr of excitement…. Nonetheless I joined the cheering group and did my tad bit for the team… That was my ONLY time on the other side of the curtain while in college..
Came second yr and I was all set to get in the team… There wasn’t a place to act but I was game for anything and acting is not really my cuppa tea… It was much more than I had painted a picture of… Endless hours of practice, exhaustive discussions, an attempt to explore every hidden emotion…I was backstage but still a part of all these activities…. Various theater exercises made me ponder over so many nuances of my own being and life. Interpretations of a touch to silence, tried to understand all. We focused on minutest details from costume, music, set to the feel. I was learning so much in so less time, it was over whelming at times. But this was better than anything I had ever done before. We made it to the finals… Euphoria…. Won the BEST EXPERIMENTAL PLAY in the finals…. Jalooosh!!!! Happiness had no bounds…
Next yr we were burdened with higher expectations and bigger responsibilities… And guess what, we withstood all of that :D :D The Ekankika (play) was a HUGE hit.. We were heroes in the campus and even outside… My heart still swells with pride when I hear ppl talking about the play… I had my first rendezvous with the feeling of “accomplishment”…
NOW, I was the captain of the Ship… Sitting in the Director’s chair was NO easy job. Auditions , team formation, timings, motivation, everything had to be taken care of. Always, had to make sure I reach before time, had a dialogue with each team member, kept the spirits high and the aim clear. It was my idea to take more fresher in the team so that the saga of theater will continue. It was a tough task, knowing it will need a lotta patience and energy. But to build something big, the foundation has to be strong, and I always kept telling myself, this is the foundation. I tried to share all I had learned, hopefully I did. Maybe, they learned more from my mistakes :) We tried everything within our limits but couldn’t make it to the finals. After tasting victory for two consecutive years, defeat was indigestible, but guess theater had one last lesson to teach me, to accept defeat and still not be a loser. :) I was crestfallen but still had to give hope to the team, that was ironical but true. Why didn’t we win, what went wrong, why did this happen during my time only, why, why why…
I keep getting answers to these questions in bits in various incidents that happen. More than the victories, the defeat had left a bigger impact, had taught much more. And today, when finally my juniors made it, I have some more answers… All the efforts didn’t go in vain after all, in fact now I know, they never do.
Cheers to theater and its rich experiences…
These slogans still never fail to make my hair stand at the end….
Even two years after being away from the action….
As I’m sitting in my hotel room on a sleepy Sunday afternoon, an e-mail pops up declaring my college makes it to the final round of Purushottam… And miles apart, in the US, I’m so excited that I can’t sit at one place…. I just wanna go back and congrulate the team, hug them, shout slogans with them….. Alas, all I can do is write a post…..
[For those who are unknown to the this world of Theater in Pune some information…
Firodiya Karandak and Purushottam Karandak are inter college Drama competitions. But it doesn’t stop there, for passionate ppl, its their life.. its an addiction.. Firodiya and Purushottam are synonyms for zeal, enthusiasm, passion and moreover a complete learning experience…]
It all began in Junior College when I used to read stories about theater, the impact it makes and how it totally changes rather enhances ones personality. I couldn’t wait to start college and become a part of a drama group. Thanks (duh…) to the slow admission procedure, by the time I got in the college, the auditions were done… And there went my one yr of excitement…. Nonetheless I joined the cheering group and did my tad bit for the team… That was my ONLY time on the other side of the curtain while in college..
Came second yr and I was all set to get in the team… There wasn’t a place to act but I was game for anything and acting is not really my cuppa tea… It was much more than I had painted a picture of… Endless hours of practice, exhaustive discussions, an attempt to explore every hidden emotion…I was backstage but still a part of all these activities…. Various theater exercises made me ponder over so many nuances of my own being and life. Interpretations of a touch to silence, tried to understand all. We focused on minutest details from costume, music, set to the feel. I was learning so much in so less time, it was over whelming at times. But this was better than anything I had ever done before. We made it to the finals… Euphoria…. Won the BEST EXPERIMENTAL PLAY in the finals…. Jalooosh!!!! Happiness had no bounds…
Next yr we were burdened with higher expectations and bigger responsibilities… And guess what, we withstood all of that :D :D The Ekankika (play) was a HUGE hit.. We were heroes in the campus and even outside… My heart still swells with pride when I hear ppl talking about the play… I had my first rendezvous with the feeling of “accomplishment”…
NOW, I was the captain of the Ship… Sitting in the Director’s chair was NO easy job. Auditions , team formation, timings, motivation, everything had to be taken care of. Always, had to make sure I reach before time, had a dialogue with each team member, kept the spirits high and the aim clear. It was my idea to take more fresher in the team so that the saga of theater will continue. It was a tough task, knowing it will need a lotta patience and energy. But to build something big, the foundation has to be strong, and I always kept telling myself, this is the foundation. I tried to share all I had learned, hopefully I did. Maybe, they learned more from my mistakes :) We tried everything within our limits but couldn’t make it to the finals. After tasting victory for two consecutive years, defeat was indigestible, but guess theater had one last lesson to teach me, to accept defeat and still not be a loser. :) I was crestfallen but still had to give hope to the team, that was ironical but true. Why didn’t we win, what went wrong, why did this happen during my time only, why, why why…
I keep getting answers to these questions in bits in various incidents that happen. More than the victories, the defeat had left a bigger impact, had taught much more. And today, when finally my juniors made it, I have some more answers… All the efforts didn’t go in vain after all, in fact now I know, they never do.
Cheers to theater and its rich experiences…
Friday, August 21, 2009
Iktara... Wake Up Sid !!!
Movie Name : Wake Up Sid
Director : Ayaan Mukherjee
Director : Shankar Mahadevan, Ehsaan Noorani, Loy Mendonsa. Amit Trivedi for Iktara
Lyrics : Javed Akhtar
Singer: Kavita Seth and Amitabh Bhattach
Orey manva tu to bavra hai...
tu hi jaane tu kya sochta hai....
tu hi jaane tu kya sochta hai bavre....
kyun dikhaye sapne tu sote jaagte....
jo barse sapne boond boond...
nainon ko moond moond...
jo barse sapne boond boond...
nainon ko moond moond....
kaise main chaloon, dekh na sakoon...
anjaane raastein....
gunjasa hai koi iktara iktara, gunjasa hai koi iktara...
gunjasa hai koi iktara iktara, gunjasa hai koi iktara...
dheeme bol koi iktara iktara, dheeme bol koi iktara...
gunjasa hai koi iktara iktara, gunjasa hai koi iktara....
sun rahi hoon sudh budh khoke koi main kahani...
poori kahani hai kya kise hai pata....
main to kisi ki hoke yeh bhi naa jaani....
ruth hai ye do pal ki ya rehgi sada...
kise hai pata....
jo barse sapne boond boond...
nainon ko moond moond...
jo barse sapne boond boond...
nainon ko moond moond...
kaise main chaloon, dekh na sakoon....
anjaane raastein....
gunjasa hai koi iktara iktara, gunjasa hai koi iktara.....(4)
This song could do what burning issues like SRK detention, Jaswant Singh episode, H1N1 scare couldn't... Make me post something on this blog.... There is a 'Draft' lying with me for each of the other issues but could never complete it.
One sleepy relatively free afternoon in the office, I was digging for good music. Wake up Sid's music was an unexplored terrain... And that is how I came across 'Iktara', this song is not yet on the TV promos and stuff... From the very first note, the song just struck a connection and kept making more n more sense...
Beautifully written by Javed Akhtar, this man is an adroit at expessing what might occur to others as the most un-expressible feelings. You have all these feelings from like forever but are never able to put it in words and suddenly listen to this song n "Bingo"... This-is-exactly-what- I wanted-to-say moment occurs... And the joy of it is unparalleled. Mr. Akhtar has given so many such moments to like billions of ppl.
SEL (Shankar Ehsaan Loy) haven't failed to impress (like almost always). But, this particular song is composed by Amit Trivedi, a guest composer, remember him from the mind blowing music of Dev D. The music is subtle to let the words dominate but still making its mark. This guy make use of every instrument in his musical arsenal. After Dev D, I was looking forward for this composer and he came up with "Iktara" fulfilling all the expectations. An awesome fusion of rustic and western influences, this song totally takes you to a different world.
Lyrics and music plays its part BUT what makes the song what it truly is, is the mesmerizing voice of Kavita Seth. Amitabh Bhattach has kept the mood going even with his very few lines. Kavita Seth is the next voice to look for in the Sufi zone. Perfect execution is all I have to say to the way this song is sung. The rustic voice creates magic. Tranquility, is what this song can give you.
Please dont miss this number. My count for the day is 23 times so far :D
Monday, July 27, 2009
All dams in 1 day !!!
It was just a figment of imagination at the start. A dream to take the "Loser Group" (My office gang, we like to call ourselvs that) out of Hadapsar for some pure FUN. Looked almost impossible at first, but owing to the determination of few ppl we managed to pull it through. :D
The Gang (L to R): Surya, Anuradha (Duddu), Anagha, Nithin, Arnab, Aiyaz.
First glimpse of the waters.. Serene and beautiful.
Shadowed: on the waters of khadakwasla .. we did leave our image
On the HUNK.... Not so HUNKS..., :P :P
Finally spotted this damn hotel....
Simply breathtaking view....
I walk this lonely road....
The Gang (L to R): Surya, Anuradha (Duddu), Anagha, Nithin, Arnab, Aiyaz.First glimpse of the waters.. Serene and beautiful.Shadowed: on the waters of khadakwasla .. we did leave our image Riding my Kinetic like MADCOCKS, they thought it was a Hyabussa....
I gave just 1 dhamki "I want it back... ONE PIECE"
At your service madam.... :P
On the HUNK.... Not so HUNKS..., :P :P
The rugby team. LOL
I dropped almost every catch...
Not an easy task, trust me... :P
Finally spotted this damn hotel....
The 1km according to them was some 800KM long.....
We starved ourselves to death locating this place....
But after 'pet pooja'... a happy pose...
Arnab couldn't get up after eating some 3 chickens and 18 bhakris....
A much needed 'break' in the WILD.... :P
My fav snap/...
Nithin occupying 3/4th of the space, we managed in the rest...
Beautiful boat ride....
Thats a ROAD, trust me...
We oaved our way through it....
I thought there must be a hole leading to NOWHERE, below the water... ;)
Me with the Eskimo and the IGLOO....
Afer an as* busting LOOOONG ride, finally we hit the HEAVEN....
Too tired to enjoy...
Simply breathtaking view....It was hard to turn my back to it, just for a pic ;)
Is mod se jate hai....
Long winding road...
Soul to soul talks (teasing,,,,, he he)...
Singing and crazy jokes....
I walk this lonely road....
HEAVEN!!!
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Happy B'Day to me !!!!
"Happy birthday to me... Happy birthday to meeeeeeeee"
That was 20 days back though, but doesn't matter, its a Bday I will cherish for ever like last 2 Bdays :D :D Every time I think "This is the BEST a Bday can get" n BANG the next Bday is even better.
2 years back:
Smuggled out of the hostel.... Blindfolded at midnight on a bike in full speed... Tripsy... Blindfold opens... A familiar looking place, decorated wid balloons n candles n all Idiots(read friends) grinning... "wats this place?? looks like... err..." ..... OH SHIT.... The Pyramid Megastore's outer landscape, one of ma fav hangout places then..... Wow, how did they manage?? CRAZY ppl... (Murli had used her communication skills to persuade the watchman to let us do so....) Skills.... Shift of place... Z- Bridge... 1 AM.... Laughter.. Euphoria... Madness... Gifts... Singing... All the ppl I want around.... :D :D
Couldn't get better I thought.... PROVEN WRONG...
1 year back:
Hostel room... "why am I not being taken out...Its almost 12!!!".... Damn looks like no plans :( Sudden blast.... Everyone in hostel at midnight... "how did they get in???".... Shhhhh... Matron may come... Wat the heck... let her come, I'm past cloud 9.... Gifts lined up... Opening begins at 2AM.... ends after 5 AM.... Letters... Hand made gifts... Cartoon strips.... Mugs... Books (pages missing :P)... IPOD... Small pictorial biography... like that was not enough.... A hand made BAND... Lotta pics... Crazy dances n non stop chats... Exams coming up in 5 days.... Absolute unadulterated FUN... aaah how I miss it!!!!
THIS yr:
Too many things changed after college... Bdays were no more celebrated like 'Festivals' :P Not cos the emotions had died but time restrained us... I had no big expectations for my Bday, just wished the ppl who matter be around. But Mr. God has decided to become a good guy :P [Well, I have always cribbed bout Him in all my previous posts and I guess as He can't 'comment', he decided to "Act"] The news of training in the US broke somewhere in May... Dates were negotiated... As soon as possible... 6 months... no no 6 weeks... Late July... Mid May.. Some other work... 31st May FINAL... NO... Just a day short of getting to celebrate my Bday wid Friends... But then the opportunity of landing in US ON my BIG day... 31st May tickets not available :D :D... Final tickets booked for 1st of JUNE... My Bday.... So I was gonna take off on my BIRTHDAY... Double celebrations... Packing... Shopping.. Bday plans.. Office formalities.. Crunched for time... Friends coming from all over... House full of shopping bags... Hugs... All the best-s... Make the most of it... Big day huh... U made it on ya Bday buddy... Lucky eh.... Wow!! Felt great... Books n loads of books (as gifts)... All smiles... Apprehension of leaving... Excitement of flying... Hint of pensiveness on going away... MIDNIGHT.... Happy Bday to me.... :D :D.... Cakes, candles, chocolates.... Suddenly away from the scene of action and watching it like a Third person... Feeling TRULY lucky to have what I have... Feeling blessed and overjoyed...
That was 20 days back though, but doesn't matter, its a Bday I will cherish for ever like last 2 Bdays :D :D Every time I think "This is the BEST a Bday can get" n BANG the next Bday is even better.
2 years back:
Smuggled out of the hostel.... Blindfolded at midnight on a bike in full speed... Tripsy... Blindfold opens... A familiar looking place, decorated wid balloons n candles n all Idiots(read friends) grinning... "wats this place?? looks like... err..." ..... OH SHIT.... The Pyramid Megastore's outer landscape, one of ma fav hangout places then..... Wow, how did they manage?? CRAZY ppl... (Murli had used her communication skills to persuade the watchman to let us do so....) Skills.... Shift of place... Z- Bridge... 1 AM.... Laughter.. Euphoria... Madness... Gifts... Singing... All the ppl I want around.... :D :D
Couldn't get better I thought.... PROVEN WRONG...
1 year back:
Hostel room... "why am I not being taken out...Its almost 12!!!".... Damn looks like no plans :( Sudden blast.... Everyone in hostel at midnight... "how did they get in???".... Shhhhh... Matron may come... Wat the heck... let her come, I'm past cloud 9.... Gifts lined up... Opening begins at 2AM.... ends after 5 AM.... Letters... Hand made gifts... Cartoon strips.... Mugs... Books (pages missing :P)... IPOD... Small pictorial biography... like that was not enough.... A hand made BAND... Lotta pics... Crazy dances n non stop chats... Exams coming up in 5 days.... Absolute unadulterated FUN... aaah how I miss it!!!!
THIS yr:
Too many things changed after college... Bdays were no more celebrated like 'Festivals' :P Not cos the emotions had died but time restrained us... I had no big expectations for my Bday, just wished the ppl who matter be around. But Mr. God has decided to become a good guy :P [Well, I have always cribbed bout Him in all my previous posts and I guess as He can't 'comment', he decided to "Act"] The news of training in the US broke somewhere in May... Dates were negotiated... As soon as possible... 6 months... no no 6 weeks... Late July... Mid May.. Some other work... 31st May FINAL... NO... Just a day short of getting to celebrate my Bday wid Friends... But then the opportunity of landing in US ON my BIG day... 31st May tickets not available :D :D... Final tickets booked for 1st of JUNE... My Bday.... So I was gonna take off on my BIRTHDAY... Double celebrations... Packing... Shopping.. Bday plans.. Office formalities.. Crunched for time... Friends coming from all over... House full of shopping bags... Hugs... All the best-s... Make the most of it... Big day huh... U made it on ya Bday buddy... Lucky eh.... Wow!! Felt great... Books n loads of books (as gifts)... All smiles... Apprehension of leaving... Excitement of flying... Hint of pensiveness on going away... MIDNIGHT.... Happy Bday to me.... :D :D.... Cakes, candles, chocolates.... Suddenly away from the scene of action and watching it like a Third person... Feeling TRULY lucky to have what I have... Feeling blessed and overjoyed...
Phew... That was a short nostalgic trip to the last 3 Bdays... Hope this unbelievable joyride continues and I'm sure it will.... :)
Saturday, June 6, 2009
20 before 30
Well staying alone in US is giving me lotta time for self dialogue. I came up with this (yet another) list of the stuff I wanna do before I turn the frightful 30 (not in a particular order). I wanted it to be "30 before 30", but din wanna write anything for the heck of it, so here it comes..... 20 before 30....
I will need a lotta help on the way... so stick around guys....
1) Run my own NGO in Rural Supply Chain or Education - Non Profit
2) Start a Branding/Advertising firm or a Service providing website - Profit :P
3) Go to the best B-School.... On scholarship of course :P
4) Complete IMDb top 250 list... Thanks to Sagar will finish it very soon :D
5) Read at least 250 books.
6) Own a chain of coffee cum book store... The best in India.
7) Direct a movie and script it too.. Well this might go a lil beyond 30
8.) Write a book
9) Have a Website of my own which is updated regularly.
10) Learn dancing... Singing is outta question so dancing.. at least 1 performing art.
11) Learn to play a musical instrument and perform with a band, Drums lessons to resume soon .
12) Learn swimming and do all water sports :D :D
13) Learn to play Tennis (Had initial courses at Fargo :P)
14) Run a full Marathon and keep doing it every year 13)Watch Tennis Grand Slams, Cricket World Cup, F1 race, Football Finals :D :D
15) Learn a Foreign language
16) Build a school... At my native village or some village.... Ruju, you will be there na???
17) Complete at least 5 treks every year.
18) Go backpacking to Europe w/o a plan
19) Make as many blog/net friends as possible. Continue hanging out with my friends every day and stay insane :D :D
20) Get well recognised in whatever I finally settle down to do.
P.S: My Bday updates n US travel coming up shortly...Its under construction....
I will need a lotta help on the way... so stick around guys....
1) Run my own NGO in Rural Supply Chain or Education - Non Profit
2) Start a Branding/Advertising firm or a Service providing website - Profit :P
3) Go to the best B-School.... On scholarship of course :P
4) Complete IMDb top 250 list... Thanks to Sagar will finish it very soon :D
5) Read at least 250 books.
6) Own a chain of coffee cum book store... The best in India.
7) Direct a movie and script it too.. Well this might go a lil beyond 30
8.) Write a book
9) Have a Website of my own which is updated regularly.
10) Learn dancing... Singing is outta question so dancing.. at least 1 performing art.
11) Learn to play a musical instrument and perform with a band, Drums lessons to resume soon .
12) Learn swimming and do all water sports :D :D
13) Learn to play Tennis (Had initial courses at Fargo :P)
14) Run a full Marathon and keep doing it every year 13)Watch Tennis Grand Slams, Cricket World Cup, F1 race, Football Finals :D :D
15) Learn a Foreign language
16) Build a school... At my native village or some village.... Ruju, you will be there na???
17) Complete at least 5 treks every year.
18) Go backpacking to Europe w/o a plan
19) Make as many blog/net friends as possible. Continue hanging out with my friends every day and stay insane :D :D
20) Get well recognised in whatever I finally settle down to do.
P.S: My Bday updates n US travel coming up shortly...Its under construction....
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